It's stopping me from living my life properly

A few months ago I had this problem where i was so conscious of my
bladder and always felt like I needed to use the toilet. I was obsessed, and it
wasnt even a feeling in my bladder but lower. I got over it a bit and have been
feeling incredible lately, but the other day i basically relapsed. I was out
shopping and suddenly felt that I HAD to go to the toilet and felt terrified
because I almost lost control of my bladder and leaked a little bit. It is
basically the same as before now but worse.
What can I do, and please dont suggest seeing a doctor or whatever because i
just cant. Im 15.
Do kegels everyday to strengthen your muscles. Kegels are when you contract and
release the muscles. Get into the habit of doing them at a certain time of day.
Also while urinating work the muscles to stop midstream for a few seconds. This
should build up your muscles and confidence.
Yes, you CAN see a doctor. There are any number of things that can cause bladder
spasms and that is what it sounds like from here. I had to take a medicine to
control them for a while until they identified the allergy causing them. That is
no big deal, but it can be a sign of something more serious.

Just get it looked at, please.
Maybe you should wear an adult diaper like "Depends" for a bit and see if that
will help you. I realize that you cannot see a doctor right now, but when you
can, don't be afraid to tell of this, it might be a medical condition.
Good luck, and God bless.